


Fortune Cookies

by AuthorReinvented



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Fortune Cookies, Humour, Siblings, canada saves the world
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-17
Updated: 2020-08-17
Packaged: 2021-03-05 22:27:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,252
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25952932
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AuthorReinvented/pseuds/AuthorReinvented
Summary: Canada's fortune cookie says he's going to save the world.Canada thinks he's gotten America's fortune. After all, theres now way a country like him could save the world.China is adamant his fortunes are never wrong.
Kudos: 23





	Fortune Cookies

"You are going to save the world." Canada's fortune cookie read, and America burst out laughing. "Dude, you must have mine! Let's switch!" He tried to pass Canada his fortune, which read, "You will soon make a new friend." but China interfered with a hand chop.

"Méiyǒu!" He scolded.

"Dude, what the hell? That hurt!" America pouted shaking his slapped hand. 

"The fortunes are never wrong!" China annouced with a grave air of finality. America wasn't buying it. 

"Really, cuz last time I got one that said "Something good will happen to you soon" , and then some kid threw up in my lap. "

China huffed. "That is stupid American made fortune, not true fortune!" He snapped. "Chinese fortune is never wrong."

Canada hesitantly spoke up. "Sorry, are you sure? Because-not to be rude or anything--but saving people is kind of America's thing, eh?" 

"Yeah, because I'm the hero!" America piped up. "And besides, making friends is more Canada's thing." 

China cut off their arguments wirh a withering look. "I guess you must be right, aru. " He said stiffly, not looking at all agreeable. Canada sunk down in his chair and murmured "Maple." 

"I'm only 4000 years old, what would I know?" 

America shifted uncomfortably. "I didn't mean-" 

"It's not like I can tell you your future just by looking at your face," China continued, still visibly insulted, and Hong-Kong hopped to his feet to distract his teacher from further ranting. 

"Yo, teach, calm down, America didn't mean it. He's an idiot!"

"Hey!" America protested, but Hong-Kongs words did their trick and China relaxed. Hong-Kong helpfully gave a few examples of times the fortunes had come true, and America's eyes widened with wonder. 

Canada, however, quietly tucked the folded fortune into his pocket, and promptly forgot about it. After all, there was no way, quiet, invisible Canada could ever save the world. 

* * *

Russia was bored. Bored _and_ lonely. He didn't have the three baltics around to "play with" as he called it, or "bully" as they said. His sisters hadn't lived with him for ages. Moreover it was cold outside and frozen from the last snowfall, so no countries would be visiting him anytime soon. Russia heaved a heavy sigh and got up and wandered into the other room to pick up the phone. When in doubt, there was always one country Russia could count on to amuse him. 

"Hello?" The voice on the other end greeted in a confused tone. Russia smirked. 

"Hello America." 

* * *

Canada sighed as his brother stormed around the house in a flurry of activity, pulling out various weapons and American flags from closets and cubby holes. 

"America calm down." Canada tried to soothe his brother. "It was just Russia, you know how he is -EH!" Canada's gentle tirade turned into a breathless cry when he saw what his brother was dragging out of the storage room. 

"Put that back!" Canada cried, voice rising hysterically. 

"Russia has nukes." America refused petulantly. "He needs to know that I have them too, except mine are bigger and better!" 

"No!" Canada cried, hyperventilating. "We don't want another cold war! Please, if you care about anyone other than yourself, put that back!" 

America hesitated, and gazed at Canada with narrowed eyes. "But if Russia is up to something I don't want to be unprepared!" Canada could see his brother wavering and decided to give him one last push before things went nuclear - litteraly. 

"Tell you what, I'll go check on Russia myself to make sure he isn't up to anything!". Canada promised breathlessly. America considered this idea, then gave in. 

"Fine, but I'm counting on you bro." He commanded, reluctantly lugging the bomb back into the back corner of the storage room. 

"I really wish you would get rid of that..." Canada whispered, but America didn't hear him. 

America reappeared and stared at Canada expectantly and Canada sighed once more, deeply, and reached for his phone. 

"Da?" 

"Hi Russia. Do you want to play hockey?" 

* * *

"Ukraine, are you alright?" Belarus was watching he sister with concern. Ukraine wiped the tears out of her eyes and attempted a reassuring smile.

"Tak. It's only my debts are a little overwhelming and I'm not sure what to do. I just wish I could get some sign of what to do next." 

Belarus furrowed her brow, wishing she could do more to her sister, when she remembered something that Lithuania had mentioned the other day. Something he had done with America...had he mentioned China too? What was it? 

Just as she was about to give on the thought, she remembered. 

"Fortune cookies!" she cried outloud. 

Ukraine blinked in confusion. "Yes?" She asked, not understanding. Belarus was fired up. 

"Wait here!" She commanded, and obediently Ukraine stayed put, blinking the last of her tears away in her confusion at her sisters actions. It didn't take long for Belarus to return with a paper bag, which she pushed into Ukraine hands. 

"Here!" She said shortly. "They're fortune cookies." And with that bare minimum of an explanation, she disappeared. Ukraine hesitated, then opened the bag, pulling out a cookie and unwrapping it. It was only the corner of a slip of paper sticking out from her cookie that stop3ped her from biting into directly. Curiously she pulled it out and studied the words. 

"Taking a new path home today may bring you new luck." 

" Oh! "

For the first time Ukraine understood what Belarus had been trying to say. She had been looking for a sign of what to do, and here was a sign, no matter how vague. She hesitated, then turned to walk home, this time, a longer way than normal. It couldn't hurt to try, right? 

* * *

Canada was meandering around, looking for an excuse to not go home, face creased with concern. 

He was concerned for multiple reasons, and both of them stemmed from Russia's earlier refusal to play Ice hockey. Russia was one of the only people who Canada could count on to always be up for a game of hockey, and the only country he could go all out against and have both of them have fun. The fact that Russia didn't want to play ice hockey was almost terrifying to Canada, because it meant Russia had found some other (probably equally violent) way to amuse himself.

This was almost as concerning as how Canada knew America would react if he found out. There was no way Canada could go back home without seeing Russia first. Who knows what his paranoid brother might do if he did. Canada began to pick up his pace nervously. 

He needed a reason to visit Russia, but without hockey as an excuse, what could he do? 

He was so drawn into his thoughts he didn't see the other person walking his way until he nearly ran into her, stopping at the last second. 

She drew back, eyes wide with surprise. 

"Sorry! Canada burst out, freezing as he took in her fretful appearance and she sized him up. A beat, and then:

" Ukraine? "

"America?" 

* * *

Russia was bored again. Rilling America up had only been amusing for a short while. His lips perked up at the thought of America rushing around getting out all his flags to proved he was the biggest and the best. 

Just as quickly his mouth twitched down again as he stared at the phone, waiting for it to ring. Maybe he shouldn't have refused Canada's offer to play Hockey. It _was_ such a fun sport, after all, and Canada was the only country who wasn't afraid to risk getting the shit beat out of him while playing against Russia. More than that, there were certainly times Canada had been the one beating the shit out of Russia. 

Russia stared at the phone harder, as though that alone would make Canada call back again with his offer. Not that Russia was looking forward to it or anything, but it _would_ be a nice way to pass the time. 

The ring came, to his surprise, not from the phone but the front door. For a moment he ripped his head, confused, wondering who could possibly coming to visit him. After fishing around in his head, he could only think of one country he had recently annoyed enough to come visit in the middle of winter. 

Russia grinned, not unlike an unsupervised child with a firework, and swung open the door happily, quite looking forward to messing with the other country for entertainment purposes. 

"Da? Amer-" 

* * *

It wasn't that America didn't trust Canada, but his brother did tend to be more passive than agressive. And if Russia was planning something, who knows what he might do to Canada if he mistook him for America! It was this process of thought that he used to justify his sneakily following Canada. He wasn't spying, he was just looking out for his brother! 

He noted Canada wasn't carrying his equipment, but that itself wasn't too strange, he knew Russia had lots of Hockey stuff at his place. What was more suspicious was his brothers meandering way of walking. America knew his brother often seemed... spacey.. but even so, Canada was moving almost as though he was just passing the time. In fact, he was wandering just slow enough that America had time to stop by the local donut shop and grab a chocolate donut. Or three. 

He was interrupted from his blissful snacking by a brief moment of panic when he notice Canada was missing, followed immediately by irritation when he located his brother. 

"Ugh. Leave it to Canada to pick up a girl in the middle of his important mission." 

He watched as Canada's brows went together as he studied the obviously distressed woman's face, and America could almost hear the words as his brother's lips moved, despite being out of earshot. 

"Hey, are you okay?" 

That was all it took as the woman exploded into tears, leaning into Canada's shoulder. For a moment Canada looked taken aback, then he gently led her to a bench and made her sit down. 

America groaned as Canada joined the woman on the bench, and offered her one of the handkerchiefs he always carried, a habit drilled into him by England. 

"This is going to take forever." 

America moaned, heading back into the donut shop for another round.

* * *

"Why don't I talk to Russia for you?" Canada offered the words before fully thinking them through. "About the Geneva commitment, I mean. I'm sure he only wants what's best for you." 

Ukraine, who had spent the better part of the hour crying, stared at him with large wet eyes. "Oh, no I can't bother you like that!" 

"It's not a bother," Canada assured her. "I was going to visit for personal reasons anyways. She sniffled a little into her handkerchief, and then hesitantly agreed.

"I'd like that." 

Canada got to his feet, dusting off his pants, and then, acting on an instinct driven into him by England, offered the tearful woman a hand up as well. He smiled at her as she took her hand, and thought about the fortune America had tried to give him earlier. 

"You will soon make a new friend." 

Maybe their fortunes had been switched after all. 

Canada threw a side long look at his new friend, and offered her a maple candy he'd dug out of his pocket, helping himself to one as well. Ukraine took it gratefully and returned his smile. 

As Canada turned to head towards Russia's house, he almost thought he heard America's voice squeak out in fear, but when he turned around no one was there.

* * *

"Ayai!" China complained, rifling through Russia's cupboards as though they were his own. "Why don't you have any tea? This is why your climate is so cold!" 

"Friend China, what are doing here?" Russia loomed after the smaller country, too curious to really be upset. China stopped rifling through cupboards as though remembering something. 

"Ah, yes, I forgot!" China reached into a pocket Russia hadn't even known he had and pulled out a fortune cookie, holding it out to Russia. 

"I came to bring you this, aru." 

Russia took it bemusedly, turning it over in his hands. 

"What is it?" 

"A fortune cookie I made myself." China responded matter-of-factly, looking quite self satisfied. 

Russia was only more confused. 

" _Why?"_

"My fortune said to make some treats and share them with a friend." China responded as though that explanation was enough. 

"Ah." Russia answered, despite not understanding at all, staring at the cookie like it was a foreign object. China finally located a dusty box of black tea, and loathingly stared at it as though wondering if it was worth bothering to boil water for it. Russia cracked open the cookie and pulled out the slip of paper inside, furrowing his forehead at the message within. 

"Make your next decision carefully. It will bring you either great pleasure or great pain." 

"Ayai," commented China, peeking over Russia's shoulder from his perch on the counter, "Chinese fortune is never wrong. Don't be reckless." 

Deciding that the tea was not, in fact, worth the effort, providing that Russia didn't even seem to own any tea cups, China hopped off the counter and headed for the door. 

"Later, aru." 

* * *

America had not shrieked. Sure, he had been a little surprised when he turned around, and had let out a _manly_ shout, but he certainly hadn't shrieked, nor hidden behind a tree. He was just making sure his brother didn't notice him following him, after all. Besides, anyone would have been surprised if they turned around and found a knife in their face.

"What are you up to? " Belarus threatened, holding the knife to America's throat. He gulped. She couldn't possibly know he was sending Canada to spy on Russia, could she? No, there was no way. America decided to play it safe.

"I don't know what you're talking about!" 

The knife pressed closer, leaving a tiny bead of blood.

"Do not lie to me!" Belarus seemed to get even angrier. America quailed. She did know! The only reason Belarus got angry was in regards to Russia, or occasionally if Lithuania was hitting on her. The knife dug in a little closer, and America yelped - bravely.

"Okay! I'll tell you!" He gave, breathing a sigh of relief as Belarus pulled the knife back, but not quite away from his throat.

"Good." She stated coldly. "Now tell me why you are stalking my sister."

"Okay I'll tel- wait, what?" America stopped mid-sentence, confused. "Your sister?"

Belarus wavered. "Tak, my sister. You were following her." America's confusion must have shown on his face, because Belarus faltered, backing up a pace.

America was putting two and two together. "That's Ukraine?" He'd seen her in passing a few times, but never long enough to pay any real attention to her features, but now that he thought about it, she did match the description of Russia's older sister...

He grinned. So that's what Canada was doing! Not picking up a chick, but getting close to Russia's big sister so he could learn her secrets! Of course, making friends was Canada's specialty after all!

Belarus was now totally confused. "You weren't stalking my sister?" America laughed out loud at that. 

"Of course not! I was stalking my brother!" America declared a little louder than nessesary. 

There was a moment of awkward silence, and then Belarus lowered her knife completely. 

"You have a brother?" 

* * *

When the doorbell rang for for the second time, Russia was sure it was America this time, and opened the door with an appropriate mischievous grin. 

"Ah, America." 

"Im not really sure how to say this, but you're mistaken."

Russia's eyes widened in surprise. 

"Canada?" it didnt make sense. He was certain he'd told Canada he didnt want to play, and there was no way Canada, ever polite, would just invite himself over, and yet-

"Can i come in?" Canada prodded softly. 

Russia wasnt sure if he stepped out of the way to let Canada inside, or if the other country simply slipped past him, and yet, there Canada was, inside his house, slipping off his shoes. Russia stared at Canada, trying to read his expression. Canada's expression remained mild. Finally. Russia asked the question he couldn't figure out. 

"Why are you here?" 

Canada turned happily to him. 

"I came to talk!"

Russia narrowed his eyes suspiciously. Him and Canada were the type of friends who played hockey together, usually ending in bloodshed, not the type of friends to chat quietly. 

For a moment Russia hesitated. Should he just kick Canada out? It was ture he was bored, and he _had_ been hoping Canada would come anyways to amuse him, but on the other hand, he was also sure that if he just rang America _one more time_ , then he was sure to have an amusing and interesting fight. 

Canada was till waiting for his response. Russia glanced at the other countries expectant face, then once more over at the phone. 

His eyes fell on the fortune China had given him. Russia didnt believed in fortunes much, but still.... 

* * *

When America stepped up to Russia's door, he knew something was wrong instantly. There were no violent sound or shouts coming from Russia's backyard rink, or any sound of playing at all. America tensed up and reached for his gun with one hand as he rung the doorbell.

There were heavy footsteps then the door swung open and Russia apeared in the doorstep. 

"Da?" He jerked the door open heavily and America didnt miss the frown on Russia's face. His heart picked up speed. 

"Yo dude." He greeted, not quite as light-heartedly as he intended. "Is Canada here?" 

There was a heavier weight behind his words than he intended, and it was clear Russia heard it, his signature beam spreading across his face. 

"Why would you think that?" 

It was an aggravation, Russia was playing with America. America wasnt in the mood for Russia's games, not when his brother was in danger. 

"You-" he started forwarwards with a snarl, but was cut off by a swirl of blue skirts as his traveling companion rushhed forwards in a way no other country would have dared, wrapping her arms around Russia's neck. 

"Big brother!" 

Russia turned pale.

* * *

China stared nervously at the fortune cookie, the last of the batch. He'd given all the fortune cookies out, all had been opened and acted on, and this one would tell the outcome. Like all divinations, the future isnt solid, but changes based on the descicions made. If any of the other countries had ignored their fortunes, interpreted them in a different way, or any number of things had gone differently, the future may have changed. 

China picked the fortune up, put it back dow, picked it up once more, then abandoned it in favour of a calming cup of tea. He was too old to be worrying like this, he knew,, but that didn't make him less nervous. If anything it made him more stressed. He poured the water into the tea leaves in his cup, and waited while it stepped. 

He glanced once more at the fortune, then at one he had taped to the fridge, a chilling line that told of the end of the world. Impulsively, China drained out the tea, swirling the cup for any remaining liquid before pouring that out too. He knew, of course, that it was pointless, that the tea leaves would only tell the same as the cookie, and his reluctance to open it was foolish, but still, if he hadnt been able to make a change, if the world was going to end, China wpuld rather read it in his tea leaves than the cookie. 

Steeling himself, China looked into the cup. 

A house. 

Breathlessly, China dived for the fortune cookie and cracked it open. 

* * *

America had never been so glad that Belarus had agreed to accompany him. He hadn't really thought they'd hit it off, Russia's scary sister, and himself, the hero, but surprisingly he'd found they had a lot in common. Of course, they both loved their siblings, and though America in no way wanted to marry his, he understood where Bélarus was coming from, in a way. The best way to protect your sibling was to keep them close, after all. That was what America had attempted in 1812, but much like Russia, his stubborn brother refused to understand. 

Of course, the main reason America was glad Belarus had come with him was because for some reason, Russia was _petrified_ of her. America grinned at how Russia turned pale and seeme to shrink at the mere sight of his sister. Oh yeah, showing up with Belarus was _much_ better than any nukes. 

America was jerked out of his thoughts by a sharp elbow jab from Belarus. 

"America, pay attention!" she commanded, and America remembered he was interogating Russia. 

"Right!" America snapped back to attention, wiping the grin from his face and narrowing his eyes. "Listen here, com-" He stopped, realizing Belarus was eyeing him warningly, and corrected himself, - "Russia, i have reason to believe Canada came here after talking to your sister, so just tell me if you've seen him or not!" 

"Why friend America-" Russia tried to start his usual mindgames, but Belarus came up behind him and put her hands on his shoulders. 

"Big brother, you'll tell me, wont you?" Her tone was even and sweet, and yet a hint threatening, and America made a mental note to learn from her. 

"Ahhhh!" Russia flinched away, twisting from under her hands. "Da, of course!" He agreed readily, putting his back against the wall.

"And?" America pressed impatiently.

"I have seen Canada." Russia admitted, not tsking his eyes off Belarus. 

"Well, where is he now?" America was struggling to keep his tension under control. 

"He's-" 

Russia's confession was cut off by a soft voice from around the corner. 

"America? Why are you here?" 

America jerked his head up as Canada appeared, padding soundlessly in his socked feet, and holding a bottle of what looked suspiciously like vodka, though America could smell the maple syrup scent from where he was standing. In a moment, Canada was engulfed in a hug. 

"Canada! Omg, are you okay? I was worried about you!" 

Canada remained unimpressed. 

"America, I told you to stay home!" He complained, wiggling out of America's crushing grip. 

America was flabbergasted. "But... But i came to save you!" 

Perhaps it was the vodka that Canada had clearly been drinking, judging by the scent lingering on his breath, or maybe Russia was a bad influence on him, but Canada spoke in a firm and commanding voice that America hadn't heard since World War II. 

" I dont need saving, and Rus-" a hiccup "-ssia and I are discussing important matters." another stifled hiccup. "Go home!" 

"But-" America tried again, scandalized. It didnt make sense. He had no problem with Canada beimg hockey buddies with Russia, he knew how violent Canada was during hockey, but being actual buddies with Russia? Not if he could help it. 

"Out." another firm command from Canada, though still gentle, exentuated by a guesture towards the door. America turned hopefully to Belarus for backuo, but Canada got to her first. 

"Ah, Belarus!" He added in a softer and less comanding tone, which America thought just wasnt fair, "Your sister is looking for you." Those words were all it took for America to know he wouldn't be getting any help from her. 

Belarus nodded a thank you to Canada, grabbed America by the arm, and hauled him away beforenhe could get the chance to protest further. 

America thought he heard Russia sigh with relief as he closed and locked the door behind him. 

* * *

"Expect good things in the days to come."

Ukraine read, having opened the other fortune in her bag from Belarus. 

"I wonder if this means Canada was able to help me?" She wondered aloud. Her thought process was cutt off by a sudden wieght on her back and arms around her midriff. 

"Big sister!" 

* * *

China dropped wearily into a chair, feeling like he'd lost a millénium off his life. 

"Aya, this scare is not good for my heart!" He complained, popping a piece of cookie into his mouth. He hesitated a moment, then pickednup his phone to dial a family member. 

"Ah, Hong-kong, it's me. Yres, i wondered if perhaps you would like to stop by for dinner sometime?" he listened to Hong-kong's response, then gave his own in return

"Next week? That's fine, aru. After all, the world isn't going to end anytime soon."

* * *

When Canada stumbled home, mostly dtunk and flushed with pleasure from his sucess of the day, he wanted nothing more than to get some rest. Tomorrow would surely be an exhausting day having to deal with America's pestering, and he needed all the energy he could get. 

As he changed from his clothes to pajamas, a slip of paper fell out of his pocket. 

"Eh? What's this?" He read it quickly with a glance, then remembered it. 

"You are going to save the world."

The fortune he got earlier from China. Canada smiled softly at it for a moment, then tossed it in the trash. It was a nice thought, of course, but in the end he knew there was no way a nation like him could ever save the world.

* * *


End file.
